Dialogs of a Pagan Heritic Vol. 3

So let us get this out of the way once and for all.

Again, I have heard the quietly whispered question… “Are you… are you a *gasp* vampire? Or a Pagan?!?!?” because of who some of my “contacts” are…. I had literally no idea I was so fucking fascinating… And Im going to be honest I have an answer to that, but a whole bunch of people are going to be pissed off at it. (Then again, Im not known for giving a fuck about what other people think, so…)

… and I am very likely going to make myself slightly unpopular with this post, and that’s ok. This subject gives me the ranty feels for many, MANY reasons, but the main reason why it makes me want to rip hair out is that it is always presented from the same two sides, and neither side want’s to take a single second to stop and evaluate some very serious (speaking from a spiritual standpoint) shit.

Disclaimer: I have poked about on both sides of this fence. I have ties to people within the VC that I hold very dear for very personal reasons, and I also have close ties to some of the pagans who decry their illegitimacy the loudest. It puts me in a very awkward position, but also one of really great perspective.

Thing #1: I will be the very first to agree that a lot of people involved within the Vampire Community, and the Vampire Spiritual Movement are off their fucking rocker, and obsessed with fantasy. Everyone within that community knows this as well. Actually, I think they organized themselves to cater to particular flavors of this obsession, and that’s actually a GOOD thing, as it makes traversing that terrain sooo much easier. HOWEVER, there are ALSO some people involved who are actually amazeballs with certain practices, and certain techniques that simply do not exist outside of the vampire community. These concepts are of value to certain people who, like me, often times find modern pagan perspectives on things like magic and energy, and having a predatory nature basically fucking useless, and unaddressed in any way other than “NO! BAD! MUST NOT!” And make no mistake… I *do* have a very predatory nature in a number of areas. It is as deeply tucked into who I am as is my love for poetry, and my adoration of coffee. I actually got a good handle on my own nature by using techniques I picked up from the VC. Before I learned these things, I was not in a good place, or a good person to be around. Basically, there IS value there, although it is buried under a lot of crap. I can say it very likely saved me from going nutters at a time when going nutters was going to land my ass in jail. The pagan community as a whole has NOTHING to address the things I was going through with. No tools. No advice. No non-judgmental perspectives to gain anything from.

Thing#2: Much of the criticism from the Generic Pagan community comes from a place of “I DO NOT want to be associated with THOSE TYPES.”, while said decriers then light purple sparkly candles to Mother Morgan, and insist that the rule of three is real because Charmed said so. It breaks the Fourth Wall for them, and so they reject it loudly. That is not to say there are not extremely valid criticisms out there (Like some of the VCs ignoring and even harvesting abusive sexual relationships among adults and minors, the very real, very HIGH chance of running into a delusional nutter within it, and the fact that motherfucking bloodborne diseases are THING to be extremely mindful about.) Basically… a lot of these conversations are NOT being had in good faith on either side. The vampire community is a nice wiping post for the Generic Pagan Community, because “Hay! At least we aren’t those guys, right?” and the vampire community has loooots of people who LOVE to play the misunderstood misanthrope card, and will do so at every opportunity, loudly, and with little more thought than you or I would give to farting on a public bus.

Thing #3: As someone who has an admitted predatory nature, and someone who also understand and takes responsibility for this, it has to be said that many of the Modern Pagan Spiritual Constructs have… very, very little to offer me. (Unless I wanna be shamed, then SCORE BABY!) You will never, ever hear me say “Im a PsiVamp” or that “I have a Vampire Soul” or any of those labels that get thrown about, but that is because I have come to a much deeper understanding of who I am than most people ever get to have. I have a much deeper understanding of the processes that are triggering this seemingly crazy “Vampire stuff” and… well, it’s an easy word to pin a lot of this stuff on, even if it is not very exacting. I would say that a more accurate term would be that there is a shifting happening, where more people are being brought into contact with the more “Infernal” strains of spirits and gods, and having no real idea what the fuck is up, they locate the VC, and shit goes downhill from there because as I have said before, the VC is full of “Teh Stupid.”

But the “Things” these people are experiencing is not as cut and dry as either side is making it out to be. And that is… an extremely frustrating thing to be in the middle of while people argue over your head about things neither one of them have *actually* gone through.